I had forgotten what it feels like to arbitrarily pick up a book, read it, and not put it down. Until I decided to resume leisure reading, and I keep reminding myself to not lose all sense of time, responsibility, and self-control, like I used to.
Switching between spiritual literature and fiction, also getting back to reading in Hindi, Marathi, and Sanskrit. I’m also reading two books simultaneously, each from a different world: one spiritual, one fictional, to please my dual personalities, who refuse to agree on anything except ruining my plans and my schedule.
I tried reading them on alternate nights, keeping the spiritual one for mornings, but my mind was completely dishevelled. I kept losing track of what I had read previously. Realized a week later, one thing at a time should be my operating philosophy, to keep my sanity. I think I've deprived myself of things I've loved that I cannot function normally.Last week, Pessoa had me consumed, so much so that I would decide to read 10 pages and end up reading 20-22. I think I'll take months... Time management and I are in an LDR*.1. The Book of Disquiet
I read a few poems by Pessoa back in 2023 and wanted to read more by him. Ordered the first search result I laid my eyes on, and now I kind of regret not getting the hardcover edition by Serpent's Tail. I wasn't ready to face the consequences of romanticizing book covers or editions. My life is now ruined!!!! I haven't completed it yet, but the episodes keep ruminating in my mind like thoughts of a lover that refuses to leave. Emotionally unavailable, but spiritually committed.
I also kept humming Cinnamon in my teeth...violet, blue, green, red...while reading Pessoa. Like my brain had decided its personality for weeks would be “artsy film montage with no plot.” I don't think I am coming out of the Wong Kar-wai's aesthetic spiral...ever. Cigarette smoke is an emotional language; only Kar-wai's admirers will understand.
2. Toru Watanabe
The (second) love of my life (Mr Darcy will always be my first). Writing this while I recovered from crushing on Itsuomi Nagi from A Sign of Affection. *sigh*
I don't remember exactly the year I read Norwegian Wood, but I think this was my third novel by Murakami. I think it was in 2015 or 2014. For years, I couldn't understand why I liked him. Probably, he seemed familiar in a way I had not yet known myself.
This time, I'll be reading him as a demisexual character. I strongly feel he is demisexual, especially in the way his relationship with Midori develops. I may or may not be projecting *wink*. If I find supporting data, I'll pour my love into a paper, and if I fail to...I'll just cry my heart out and move on...probably even forget about him.*LDR = Long-distance relationship.